How can I gain my friend's trust again?

Okay, I have a really twisted situation going down in my life right now, and I need some advice. It basically is built around my love for a guy....we'll call him Devon (even though that's not his real name.) Devon is a fashion model from Harlem, whom I've always admired and adored because for as long as I could remember. I've always felt that I could see myself in him because of his style, persona, and how he represents himself. There's a long story as to how I discovered Devon, and for what's like forever now, he has had a very vital effect on my life. I've never met Devon personally, although he knows who I am, and I believe we were possibly together in another life....and there's a back story to that, so please don't judge me. I've had various encounters with Devon and people in his life online and even over the phone. Although, for the past year now, Devon has been "in a relationship" with a female model all for the fashion industry, and she has been using and misleading him. I've gotten into a hell of a lot of sh*t because of this situation, and over time, I've tried to show Devon my true feelings for him and testify that he is being deceived. A lot of things happened, and I became EXTREMELY notorious for my love for Devon. But one day, I came into contact with a girl from Brooklyn who literally knocked down the brick wall that was standing between me and Devon. We will call her Ciara. Ciara found me online, through the infamous website Formspring.me. She stuck up for me when people were talking junk about my situation going on with Devon. She started talking to me on Facebook and we became tight. We called each other, and I told her the whole story behind the situation with Devon. She was inspired by it and she told me she was down for helping me. She wrote on Devon's Facebook fan page, telling him he was an inspiration to Harlem and people around the world. Shockingly, Devon started hitting on her and over the course of 2 days, he started trying to get with her. There was a whole bunch of stuff that happened, and I won't get into that. But that night, me, Ciara, and Devon all ended up on a 3 way call. I told him what was going on and he could relate to me. He fell for me and we had the most deep & intense conversation ever. So, I was convinced that everything was going to fall into place between me and Devon. But I didn't hear from Devon for two weeks, and I was frustrated because he called Ciara from a private number and we didn't know how to contact him. Devon's model agents and PR people have also been on my case from day 1, therefore they block me from contacting him on Facebook or anywhere else. But then, about a week and a half ago, Ciara called me with Devon on the line. Something bad happened which I won't get into, but Devon and I got into a fight about his relationship with his phony-a.s.s. "girlfriend" and he said some horrible things to me. He hung up on me. But then, he continued to call Ciara as if he was asking for more. Ciara told him he was an idiot for doing this and she asked him if he had seen the deep explanation video that I made him telling him how I felt back in February. He said no, and he said he wanted to see it. I sent it to Ciara, and she forwarded it to Devon. He told her he wanted another video, an up to date one. And he told her "I won't lie, that video touched me. But I want a new one" or something like that. So, one week later, I put together a new video telling Devon my feelings about the situation. But things got more complicated.....Ciara stopped all contact with me. Why? Because I made some mistakes and exploited too much of my issue with Devon over the internet. See, I like to vent online; it calms my anxiety. But Ciara got upset because she says I can't understand what it means to have a secret plan that is only going to work if it is a secret. I'm trying to gain Ciara's trust back and prove her that I can keep this all a secret and will never mess this up again by telling everyone what's going on with me and her and Devon. She won't even send Devon my new video and she's ignoring every little email, call, text, ect. She's pissed, because in Harlem & Brooklyn, you can catch a case quick and she says she's done with this. The thing is, I don't know what I'm going to do if I don't have Ciara to help me. I can't get in contact with Devon. I don't even know what the deal is anymore. Ciara knocked down numerous barriers between me and Devon, but now those barriers are slowly being built back up again and Ciara is the only soul out there who knows how to help me knock them down again. I GET IT NOW that I have to keep this whole thing confidential, because this whole thing is getting really tight and I know there's a possibility that Ciara, Devon and I can get into trouble if I exploit this any further. And I